How Long Will it Take to Get a Diagnosis of Infertility?

One of the most stressful parts of infertility is understanding when a pregnancy is just coming slowly and when to say, “this is a problem of infertility.” Unfortunately, the lines are very blurry and it is hard for most women to know (and to accept) that they are dealing with a true fertility challenge.

Here is a You-Tube video of Kim Hahn. Kim is the founder and CEO of Conceive Magazine, and also wrote the introduction to our book, I Am More Than My Infertility. In this video, Kim talks with the people at NewBaby.com about the diagnosis of infertility and the time line it involves.

Caffeine and Infertility

Nix caffeine!!

That’s the latest message from a new study published by the Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology. According to this new research, pregnant women who consume as little as 200 mg of caffeine a day–the amount in 10 ounces of coffee or 25 ounces of tea–may double their risk of miscarriage.

Of course, there is some debate as to the specifics. Some doctors say just give up the caffeine for the first 3 or 4 months of pregnancy. Others say just limit your caffeine intake to one cup. But to my way of thinking, why take chance?

There’s really no down side to giving up caffeine–once you get through the headaches or tiredness that happens initially for some people. But even this can be minimized by just decreasing your caffeine intake gradually.

For additional information on diet and fertility, go to our book, I Am More Than My Infertility – 7 Proven Tools for Turning a Life Crisis into a Personal Breakthrough. Right now our book is on a special price on our website www.IAmMore.net.

Marina

An Ethical Problem in Adoption or Sperm Donation

The other day, I was flipping through the Orlando Sentinel, and came across the article, “What If A Spouse is a Twin?” (www.Orlandosentinel.com; January 12, 2008). The incident reported took place in London, where twins, who were separated at birth, got married, without realizing they were brother and sister. Lord David Alton, a British lawmaker, is urging more information be provided on birth certificates for adopted children.

The first thing I thought about when I read the article was how many couples I’ve worked with who have voiced the same concern about fertility procedures. For example, a sperm donor may have donated many times, and as a result, have fathered a number of children. If the genetic father, or even the fact that donor sperm was used, is not identified, who’s to say what the source of attraction is between two people?

Lord Alton favors an amendment to the Human Fertilization and Embryology Bill that would require birth certificates of children born from donated sperm to say so, and to identify the father genetic. To my way ot thinking, this is a good idea, and it’s time that the law caught up with reproductive technology. Any thoughts?

Marina

I Am More Than My Infertility Guest Book

We wanted to make everyone aware of our new Guest Book on the I Am More Than My Infertility Blog and invite you to sign in and leave your comments. If you have looked at our visitors map lately, (located on the left column of the blog) you will notice that this blog has readers from all parts of the world.

Dealing with the challenges of infertility and other fertility issues feels very lonely. But, in fact, there are many, many women who have walked in your footsteps. Some have achieved successful pregnancies, others have adopted children, and still other women have decided to make happy, fulfilled lives that are not defined by motherhood, fertility, and parenting.

Marina and I are very appreciative when you sign the Guest Book or leave comments on a blog post. Together, women can be a powerful source of support and sharing for one another.

Thanks for taking time to visit the I Am More Than My Infertility blog. You will find the link to the Guest Book just below the header at the top of the page.

Linda and Marina

authors of I Am More Than My Infertility: 7 Proven Tools for Turning a Life Crisis into a Personal Breakthrough available at www.iammore.net and amazon.com.

Fertility and Infertility Treatments: Understanding When Enough is Enough

I’ve been reading some of the fertility and infertility blog sites lately, and I’ve noticed that for some women who hoped to have a baby by the new year, the realization that 2008 has already begun is a difficult one.

If you are finding yourself feeling burned out, perhaps a break from your quest for a child is in order. The following quiz is one I compiled for Conceive Magazine. The title of the article, “Knowing When to Shift Gears,”(Summer 2005; www.conceivemagazine.com) spoke specifically to the issue of fertility treatment and how to decide when enough is enough. Take a moment now and check in to see where you are on your journey:

1. Do you often find yourself mentally and emotionally tired?
2. Are you losing hope about the outcome of your medical treatment?
3. Does it seem as if your whole world has become about infertility and that little else matters?
4. Do you find yourself irritable on the days you have a doctor’s appointment?
5. Imagine that a doctor has informed you of a new medical advance. Do you wish you didn’t know?
6. Are you feeling resentful that you’ve had to give up so much to pursue treatment?
7. Is there more tension and arguing between you and your spouse?
8. Are your money reserves getting dangerously low, putting you at financial risk?
9. Do you find yourself desperate, pursuing treatment against medical recommendation?
10. Is the idea of becoming a parent becoming more important than being pregnant?
11. Does an end to the demands of treatment and a “return to normal” sound like a relief?
12. Do you look in the mirror and find it hard to remember who you were before, or hard to recognize who you’ve become?

If you’ve answered “Yes” to a majority to these questions, it may be time for you to end treatment and reconsider your goals. Even if you just answered “Yes” to a few questions, see these responses as red flags. It may be time for you to take stock of where you are and consider taking a break from treatment.

Knowing when to stop and when to go on is something Linda and I write about in our book, I Am More Than My Infertility.

I Am More Than My Infertility

When people discover the title of our book, “I Am More Than My Infertility: 7 Proven Tools for Turning a Life Crisis into a Personal Breakthrough,” one of the first questions they ask is, “What is the I Am More?” With the new year beginning, I wanted to share some thoughts about how this title came to be.

“I Am More,” is unique to each woman, but there’s also a common thread. Each one of you wants to be able to express yourself authentically and creatively in your world. You can even say that this is one of your driving forces to have a child.

But unfortunately, too many of you put lables and limitations on yourself that hold you back. Take your struggle with infertility, for example. Have you ever told yourself, “There’s something wrong with me;” “I don’t belong;” “I’m not a real woman?” The messages of these words are powerful and destructive. They cut to the core of who you are in a very negative way.

Even though the issue is infertility, the limitations don’t stop there. How often have you said, “I’d love to do, or try, or learn such and such, but I can’t because: I’m not smart enough/pretty enough/ thin enough/ rich enough/young enough?” Holding yourself back because you believe you are not enough is not just limited to infertility; it can be a life choice.

The 7 tools of our book give you a road map to transcend this way of thinking. The result is that even when the crisis of infertility is long past, you have grown, gained the self-awareness, and learned the skills to follow your heart’s desire. What better way to start the new year!